My husband Jake writes,
How many of you value Security? Have you ever considered Security as a value? Have you ever noticed that you actually feel “security” in your body? Security is a survival emotion and usually people feel it in the bottom 3 energy centers (some people call them chakras).
Let me give you an example of insecurity. The event happened around 17 years ago. I was a proud father of 3 beautiful daughters that were 5 and 6 years old, married, and had a good job. Things were busy and seemed to be working out.
We were always very careful with who watched our daughters. Being a father, I felt it was my job to keep them and my wife safe and secure to the best of my ability. As such, we only allowed 4 people ever to watch our girls for us and that was a very rare thing. That gave me a lot of security because I had carefully vetted these people.
Thinking back on that feeling, I felt strong in my gut! It was a very solid feeling. A feeling as if you have strong abs even if you don’t kind of thing.
Then one night while I was on a business trip to Kentucky, I got a call from my wife that one of those adults had touched my beautiful little girls inappropriately. My security was massively violated!
I felt acid pouring into my stomach and my stomach cramped like I had been punched. My intestines felt loose like my bowels were full of foam. My bladder muscle felt like it might let go.
That shock was so great that I made it about me. I had let down my family. I had failed to protect them. My idea of security put them in danger. My world got very small. I could trust no one except myself. I was SHAKEN!
I held on to that feeling of insecurity in my body for years! I had stomach problems, I always felt sick. I had trust issues. I lashed out because I was hurting.
It wasn’t until I remembered what it felt like to be secure IN MY BODY so I could exchange it for the insecure feeling. Being able to exchange the insecure feeling for the secure feeling, gave me just one more key towards being UNSHAKABLE!
If you found this post interesting or thought-provoking, check into joining the Beyond Brave Community where Evelyn has many healing conversations with other survivors like you.