For me, promises aren’t only commitments–actions I say I’ll do. Promises are also heart exchanges between me and my higher power (the universe, Tao, Goddess, God). Heart promises are prayers, manifestations and intentions.
Before I started believing in myself in my mid-thirties, I didn’t feel like I could influence ANYTHING, let alone the energy of the universe. My family of origin taught me to be a small, helpless child whose self-esteem depended on other people’s opinions, wants and needs.
After I divorced my first husband, I spent a year alone and learned A LOT about myself. I realized I could pray for things intentionally. So I prayed for a boyfriend, and he was absolutely everything I asked for!
Except he turned out to be an alcoholic and narcissist along with being the perfect guy. So I ended that relationship. And realized that my childhood, and the sexual abuse I’d experienced when I was five years old, was still skewing what I thought I wanted in a relationship.
Good realization! I discovered I had the power to manifest what I wanted, with the help of my higher power, and I discovered that what I thought I wanted wasn’t always healthy for me because I wasn’t healthy.
My experience with sexual abuse still twisted my choices in adult relationships.
I had more self-work to do. I was/am powerful, and must be careful with my powers.
Do you think your past experiences still influence your choices today?
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