Why are some people angry and destructive right now, and some people stubbornly happy and actually thriving? We are all going through the same social unrest, political chaos, and global pandemic, even if our individual circumstances are different from each other.
I believe our responses to this traumatic time are based in hope (or lack of it). Sexual violence survivors are experts in hope, and we have a lot to say to everyone else who is having a traumatic experience right now.
Hope is a process, not an airy-fairy “feeling”. We must work to have hope, not sit around wishing things would be better, or praying other people will change their ways.
Hope begins with the idea of personal agency. Pamela Larde says, “Agency is our internal reservoir. It is our sense of ability, freedom, strength and will to pursue our interests and desires.”
Each of us can do something right now to fill up our internal reservoirs of agency. No matter what is happening around us, we can build hope for ourselves by learning new skills or remembering skills we already have (ability). We can see ourselves as people who make choices (freedom). We can practice our good qualities and break bad mental and emotional habits that have crept in (strength). We can sit quietly with ourselves and remember that only we can change our own attitudes (will).
Do you see how agency works? You already have an internal reservoir. Has your energy reserve run dry in the past few months? It has for a lot of people, so you are not alone.
Please feel free to leave a comment telling us how you’re feeling right now: Hope-full or Hope-less? We are all having a collective, national trauma. How can we, individually, build our internal reservoirs of agency?
If you found this post interesting or thought-provoking, check into joining the Beyond Brave Community where Evelyn has many healing conversations with other survivors like you.
Reference: Larde, P. (2018, Aug 27). Post-traumatic growth: Hope is a strategy, not a feeling. Juvenile Justice Information Exchange. https://jjie.org/2018/08/27/post-traumatic-growth-hope-is-a-strategy-not-a-feeling/